Dating a police officer is a fantasy of many women around the globe. After all, a man in uniform is not only attractive, but he acts as the protector against the evil in the world. At the same time, dating a cop is no easy feat.
The nature of an officer's job requires dedication, tiring schedules and a good deal of secrecy. As with all relationships, dating a cop will take a lot of work, but on a whole new level. Fortunately, I can offer plenty of tips for creating a loving and loyal relationship with a police officer:
#10. Learn to Love the Unpredictable Schedule
A cop's schedule is no typical 9-5; in fact, he will rarely have full weekends off, and he may need to work crazy hours late at night or in the early morning or be called in randomly. As a result, you will have to learn to work around a hectic and unpredictable schedule. For some, this can be seen as a drag, but it can actually be a cause for spontaneity and will be anything but routine and boring!
#9. Make the Most Out of Every Free Moment With Shared Experiences
When you get a chance to spend time with your partner, make the most out of your time together. All relationships benefit from shared experiences together, from big ones to small ones alike. Make sure to keep your relationship exciting by creating new and memorable times together, whether at home or out and about.
If you're having trouble coming up with good ideas for shared experiences, consider these highlights for many couples:
#8. Patience Will Be the Key to the Lock of the Relationship
Every relationship will require patience, but dating a police officer requires a whole new level of it. Police officers go through a lot during their shifts, dealing with difficult people and situations that can take a toll on their mental and physical health alike. They will often need time to relax and refresh after a hard day's work, which will require patience on your part, especially if you are someone who prefers to keep active or go out a lot.
Having a lack of patience in a relationship can have long term effects, including resentment in which partners can find themselves "racking up the 'offenses' that the other partner has committed." Understanding when your partner needs time to unwind (and vice versa) is crucial to having a long-term and healthy relationship.
#7. Allow Your Compassion to Shine With Your Partner
Speaking of difficulty on the job, many cops suffer from PTSD, anxiety, depression or other similar forms of mental health issues. Therefore, dating a cop will bring out the compassionate side of you as you will have to potentially face any or all of these conditions. Be sure to check in on your partner's mental health by encouraging him to speak with you and let him know that you are a safe person to talk with.
Columbia University crafted a list of questions you can use to ask anyone in your life including your partner that remain empathic, non-judgemental and supportive:
Simply asking one of these questions can be enough to show support. Sometimes, your partner may not feel up to the task of opening up, which is also completely fine. The fact that you are taking the time to inquire will be much appreciated.
#6. Trust May Be Cliche, But It's True
One of the most cliche pieces of advice you will hear about developing any relationship is to 'trust one another.' It may be a stereotypical phrase, but it remains one of the cornerstones of a relationship between two people, especially when it comes to relationships between cops and citizens.
As stated earlier, police officers remain a fantasy for many women. As such, police officers often receive attention from various women, which can be difficult for some women to deal with. To have a good relationship with a police officer, you will have to keep your trust in check at all times and remain confident both with yourself and with your partner.
#5. Accept That You Are Dating a Man of Mystery
Yes, it's important to have a trusting and open dialogue with your partner. Still, as a police officer, there are limits as to what he may be able to share with you out of both legal boundaries and respect for his profession. While you may be curious as to what is occurring in a case or what was the cause of a particular situation at work, your partner will not always be willing to share everything. While this may seem like an initial disadvantage, it can actually be part of what is alluring about dating a police officer in the first place.
#4. Have Fun With The Love Language Test
In 1992, author Gary Chapman released the book "The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate." In the book, Chapman described his 5 'languages of love' that each individual supposedly follows and best expresses themselves with:
Nowadays, there are plenty of quizzes online that you and your partner can take to figure out each other's language of love. In doing so, you can figure out how to deepen your communication with each other and strengthen your overall bond. Plus, taking a couple's quizzes is always fun!
#3. Take Advantage of a Learning Experience
One of the biggest benefits of dating a police officer is learning more about how the law works. You will be able to see firsthand the process of the law in action, and you have an opportunity to educate yourself further (within boundaries of legality, of course). Also, your partner will love that you take an interest in his work, again portraying your passion.
#2. Don't Forget, You're Not Above the Law!
It might be tempting to believe that you can get away with some things or illegal activities because your partner is a police officer. Actually, doing anything that goes against the law puts your partner in a very uncomfortable and unfair position, as their duty is to the law, no matter who is breaking it. By having respect for the law, you are showing respect for your partner as well.
#1. Most Important of All, Don't Forget Yourself
Those in a relationship with police officers may sometimes feel that they have to commit a lot of self-sacrifices or make a lot of compromises to meet their partner's needs. In fact, it's equally as important to make sure you have a healthy relationship with yourself. After all, there are two people in a relationship, and both of their needs must be respected.
You can do so in the following ways:
Let your partner know that your time is as valuable as his in every way. If he is a healthy partner, he will not only respect that, but will encourage you to do what you need to do!
Yes, dating a police officer certainly comes with its difficulties, but the rewards can be even more beneficial. Police officers' professions require loyalty, compassion and dedication, and respectful traits in any person to have. By dating a cop, you get to witness your partner displaying these traits firsthand and often. As with any other relationship, you will have to have strong communication, deep trust and empathy, though portraying these traits will often be more often. These tips I have provided will ensure that your relationship will remain strong, healthy and a lot of fun!