It's often tougher for men than women to write a dating profile. That might sound stereotypical, but most men have a harder time opening up and pouring out their hearts in a little profile. Women have a million responses while men just stare at the screen sometimes. It's also more likely a man will reach out first just because many people believe in the tradition of men being the first to make the move.
It's a new age in life so it really doesn't matter who reaches out first. Women are tired of seeing the "What's up" message in their DM. If you want them to reach out, you have to stand out. If you need help with your dating profile, step it up a notch. We have a few ways that will help you find better matches on your road to finding your soulmate
#1. You Can't Win Them All
It doesn't matter if you're the most charming, handsome, perfect man in the world. There will be people that don't care. Everyone has a type. You cannot take it personally that you don't fit in someone's "type."
There are a million fish in the sea, and you probably didn't pursue half of them that you didn't feel any chemistry with. It's important to remember that this theory works both ways. Some women just don't want to pursue you. It's not you, it's them. You cannot please everyone when you're putting yourself out there. Smile and move on when someone doesn't reach out. It's their loss.
#2. Don't Overuse Movie Quotes and Old Jokes
Women know men love to quote "The Big Lebowski" and "Old School." It's cool a few times, but it gets old fast. It's also not as funny when you put old jokes in your profile. Unless you're a stand-up comedian, don't try it.
Quotes are often simply out of place on a profile. They start to look more like filler than actual things about you. They just don't work with the women. They're like pick-up lines that you think are genius, but women just roll their eyes and walk off.
#3. Don't Lie About Your Looks
If you plan to meet any of these women in person, they're going to figure out you're lying if you don't tell the truth about your looks. If you're short, don't say you're a giant. Hey, Tom Cruise is considered short to most women, but no one seems to care. Women care more about your heart than your height.
Don't put up a picture from 20 years ago. Don't lie about your age. If you lie, women are going to sniff it out. You want someone that likes you for you.
#4. Try to Be Normal Without Sounding Boring
Women are risking a lot when they reach out to a guy. They have no idea if you're Ted Bundy or Prince Charming. You don't want to stand out like a sore thumb. You also don't want to seem boring. There needs to be a healthy balance on your profile.
Show off your best side. Don't go into detail about your Star Wars collection. You can be a little boring without going overboard. It's also important to blend in a little bit. If you sound like you're Jim Carrey, some women cannot handle that type of personality. Try to balance your profile with a little bit of everything.
#5. Make Your First Impression Quickly
A good book hooks you with the first few lines of print. It's annoying to read through hundreds of profiles that all sound the same. You have to make a great first impression within a few seconds.
This means posting the top pictures that show you as a whole. This means writing a headline that reflects who you are as a person instead of something silly. You don't have a few pages to attract the women. You have a little time and a little space to make that first impression count.
#6. Don't Be a Jerk or a Dork
Most people sort guys into a few different categories. These categories often include "jerk" or "dork." You don't have to be either. You'll see a guy holding his favorite bottle of vodka at the nightclub looking like a total player or you'll see a guy posing with his gaming system playing World of Warcraft.
You don't need to be either of these guys. Again, it's all about balance. Show off your dorky side because girls think it's cute. Show off your jerk side because girls seem to go for the bad boys at times. They really want a balance of all of these guys. Make your profile sound like you're somewhere in the middle.
#7. Don't Write When You're in a Bad Mood
Don't write your profile when you're angry at the world. The words won't be positive. You want to give off positive energy to attract positive women. When you write about happiness, you'll attract happiness.
A confident man will attract a positive person. This type of charm comes out in your profile making you more desirable to women. They love a man that is happy and confident.
You should also write about the things that make you happy in life. Keep your profile updated with the newest content in your life. If you just started kickboxing or went on a cool trip, talk about it. Your excitement will pour out on the page.
#8. Don't Tell Your Sob Story
If you've ever gone out with someone who tells you their entire life story on the first date scaring you with all of the gory details, you understand it's not cool to share your sob story. Don't list all of the ways women have broken your heart. This is going to make the women scrolling feel sorry for you.
Imagine a woman excited reading about a great guy. Then she gets knocked in the face with his depressing stories about women doing him wrong. She starts to wonder if he's just a baby or he just has bad luck.
Save the depressing stuff for later. Your baggage shouldn't matter on your dating profile. You can mention things here and there, but don't ambush women looking for a fresh date.
#9. Keep the Sexual Humor out of It
Don't tell dirty jokes and refer to sexual innuendo when you're writing your profile. You're going to sound like a college frat boy.
If you meet a woman who loves a good dirty joke, save it for the date. Don't throw it out there on your profile. Some women will be totally turned off by these comments. You need to showcase your best qualities on your dating profile. Don't hide behind dumb dirty jokes.
#10. Think About Your Pics
A lot of people think it's strange to take pictures of themselves so they just have a bunch of random dark photos. Make sure you have someone snap a picture of you in great lighting. Highlight your best features.
If you have a great picture of you in a suit from your buddy's wedding, include it on your profile. If you have a picture of you lounging outside having a beer with a friend, include it. The picture should capture the essence of you.
Don't fill your pictures with your pets, your friends or half-naked selfies. For goodness sake, don't post the gym selfie. Don't post pictures of you with the hottest women in the club. Be normal with your photos. Women want to see you in your life having a good time.
#11. Don't Be Cocky
There's a difference between being confident and being cocky. It's a fine line. You can list all of the reasons why you're great, but you'll probably be pushing too hard. Don't try to sell yourself so much. Everyone understands there is no perfect man. If you're bragging about your high school and college achievements, you'll have women looking on.
You can mention special things about yourself while staying humble. Focus on your greatest achievements in a passionate way. No one cares that you were voted "Most Handsome" in high school. They want to know what you can offer them now. Talk about achievements that make you stand out in a personal way.
#12. Be Funny
Many women love a good sense of humor. There are also the super-serious women that don't like to joe around, but usually, you'll reel in the funny ones with a light joke. Remember, don't go overboard with the silly jokes. It's just fun and simple to show off your light side. Show her that you can make her giggle.
You can also break the ice with a good joke. Write funny, clever jokes. Don't ever be offensive to anyone. If she loves a funny guy, you've already won.
#13. Stay Away from Negativity
No one wants to take a bath in negativity. If you only talk about the negative aspects of dating and your life, women will run away. You don't have to explain every reason why your relationships didn't work out.
If you sound negative in writing, women will assume that you're worse in person. No one wants that awkward interaction. You might have a broken heart. You might not feel confident. This is all just fine, but you don't need the world to know it. Offer your positive thoughts and attributes. Always see the bright lining through the gray clouds.
#14. Don't Ask for a Unicorn
If you only ask for certain attributes in a woman, you won't get much interaction. There are amazing unicorns out there, but you could miss out on some special women if you only shoot for your one dream unicorn.
If you only aim to date the beautiful, successful, happy woman that loves your music, is a brunette and cooks a mean steak, you might be stuck in limbo for years. It's hard to find the exact qualities you want in a woman if you don't open yourself up to many different types of people.
Be open on your journey to find love. You might fall in love with someone that hates your music and cannot cook to save her life. You might actually love the differences. The odds are if you date someone that is just like you and has all of these perfect qualities, you'll find something wrong with her.
Make sure the things that matter are first and foremost. It's important you share the same morals, hopes for life, thoughts on children, and other things of this nature. The unicorn is wild and free for a reason, remember that.
#15. Don't Sound Too General
If you say you're "fun" or "sweet," you've lost some women. Every guy says these things. Tell me what sets you apart. Almost every man says they love to party, but love to cuddle. They always say they want someone fun. It's all jibberish.
Talk about your passions in life. Talk about the things that you love. Make your personality jump off the page. Give your idea of a perfect date. Talk about the best day of your life. Make yourself stand apart from all the fish in the sea.
Don't be afraid to be yourself. Women love when a man's profile is distinct. If you're just like all the rest of the guys, she will scroll right on past you.
#16. Don't Ask for Only Physical Traits
It's sickening when a guy's profile talks about wanting "long, flowing hair with a fit body." In today's world, you might as well head to jail treating women that way. Women don't take too kindly to men not treating them amazing these days.
You can talk about special personality traits that truly matter to you. You can even hit on common interests. Your soulmate may not love everything you do, but you might bond with someone out there that loves hiking just as much as you.
You can turn the tables by talking about how much you love to go to basketball games or hunt deer. If she loves these things as well, she'll probably reach out. This puts the ball in her court instead of you asking for a woman that enjoys hunting.
#17. Stay on Top of Your Spelling and Grammar
Punctuation matters. Some guys zip through their profiles forgetting to check for any errors. Women notice these things.
If you have hundreds of grammar errors and misspellings, you just seem careless. It looks like you just wanted to finish so you could get to swiping left or right. Women want a man that looks like he cares about what he puts out there for public knowledge.
It's totally cool if you have a few typos or misspell a few words. The problem happens when you have hundreds of mistakes.
#18. Think About Your Headline
Most dating websites let you create a short headline with your username and photo. This is very important when women are scrolling through the men. Don't stress yourself out over trying to create the perfect headline. It's important to think about it, but don't go overboard.
Catch her eye with a unique headline. Don't be negative, don't say you're looking for your dream girl, and don't be too emotional. These words are powerful. They should be concise and describe you in a few words. Remember to have fun with it.
#19. Keep It Consistent
A woman should be able to create a mental image of the person you are from reading your profile. If your photos totally contradict everything you say in your profile, you're running her off.
If you talk about loving to relax on the couch watching football, but have photos at the nightclubs, you're painting a confusing picture. Keep your profile consistent in the way that she can understand you.
Your profile should paint a picture in words. Your photos should go along with these words. This helps "sell" you before she even meets you.
#20. Think About Message Content
After you set up your profile, you'll want to start sending messages. Think about these messages before you even start to composite them. You'll want to make a great first impression. Remember it's important to make your messages reflect your profile.
You don't want all of the focus on you. You want to make the other person feel special as you reach out. You can talk about mutual interests. You can even give her compliments. One thing to remember is that you don't want a penpal. You're in this for a girlfriend, so ask her out if you're interested.
#21. Don't Lead Her on with False Information
You may lead a girl on with cute pictures of your nephews or your latest charity work, but a girl will figure out if it's all a farce. If you only pick up that nephew for a cute photo or attend a charity event for the photo op, your lies will be uncovered. You might reel her in for a few dates, but she will run once she figures out you're a jerk.
Don't lead girls on with a fake profile of your life. Don't post pictures that don't mean anything to you. If you're looking for a real relationship, it's important not to dupe people into thinking you're someone else. You're just wasting everyone's time when you look one way and act another way.
Your dating profile should be a reflection of you as a person. By highlighting your best features and qualities, you're putting yourself out there. You'll find your match by being yourself. Have fun, be real, be open, and enjoy the journey.